Psalms 142:4, “I looked on my right hand, and beheld, but there was no man that would know me: refuge failed me; no man cared for my soul.”
There have been a handful of times in my life where I was at the bottom. There was a low time in my life in 2009-2013 when I seriously contemplated suicide to make the pain go away, both physically and emotionally. Suffering in the body is bad enough (from my neck injury), but coupled with the added emotional pain it was overwhelming, but God saw me through. King David in our text passage said that refuge failed him. David said that NO MAN cared for his soul. That is how I feel right now. Sometimes there is no place that we can go for refuge except the Lord. I've been at the bottom of life, when there was absolutely NO WHERE TO LOOK EXCEPT UP TO GOD! Brother Lester Roloff was absolutely right, who wisely said:
“A test of a Christian's character is what he does after he comes to the blockade in the road and what his attitude is after everything has left him except Jesus. You will never know down here that Christ is all you need until Christ is all you have left. You will never be able to tell the world for sure that He will do in a crisis unless you learn how to live in a crisis.” —Evangelist Lester Roloff (1914-1982), a quote from the sermon, “How To Go On When You Can't”
I just moved from Guam to Florida last month in July of 2021. I am all alone in Pensacola. I feel like a fish out of water. I don't want to go into much detail, but I feel like no one understands what I am going through. And in truth, they don't. You don't realize how selfish people truly are until you're in a situation where you need their help, love and compassion the most. Sadly, people just don't care like they should. I care, but it is only because I have been at the bottom of life multiple times. I know what it means to suffer.
I ordered a book by Pastor M.R. DeHaan (1891-1965) from Amazon.com titled, “BROKEN THINGS: WHY WE SUFFER.” I want to share with you a wonderful quote by Dr. DeHaan from page 59:“The greatest sermons I have ever heard were not preached from pulpits but from sickbeds. The greatest, deepest truths of God's Word have often been revealed, not by those who preached as a result of their seminary preparation and education, but by those humble souls who have gone through the seminary of affliction and have learned experientially the deep things of the ways of God.The most cheerful people I have met, with few exceptions, have been those who had the least sunshine and the most pain and suffering in their lives. The most grateful people I have met were not those who traveled a pathway of roses all their lives through, but those who were confined, because of circumstances, to their homes—often to their beds. They had learned to depend upon God as only such Christians know how to do.” —Pastor M.R. DeHaan, “BROKEN THINGS: WHY WE SUFFER,” page 59; Barbour Publishing, Inc., 1948
“The 'gripers' on the other hand, are usually those who enjoy excellent health. The complainers are those who have the least to complain about. But those dear saints of God who have refreshed my heart again and again and again as they preached from sickbed-pulpits have been the men and women who have been the most cheerful and the most graceful for the blessings of almighty God.The Bible tells us distinctly that there is a special reward and a special crown which the Lord has prepared and laid up for those who suffer patiently. This principle is suggested by the incident recorded in I Samuel 30.David, along with 400 strong, healthy men, had gone out to seek the enemy. Two hundreds, however, had remained behind because they were weary and faint, probably because of some physical infirmity. These David had left behind to guard the camp and the equipment of those who went into the heat of the battle. After the victory had been won, the four hundred who had been active participants in the battle refused to share with those who had remained behind and said, 'We'll give them just a little bit, but we're going to take the spoils.At this point, David stated the eternal principle in the words of 1 Samuel 30:24, 'As his part is that goeth down to the battle, so shall his part be that tarrieth by the stuff: they shall part alike.'
Those of you who remain by the stuff are not overlooked or forgotten by God: there is a very definite and special reward laid up for God's patient sufferers.If you, child of God, are upon a bed of illness, if you are being troubled by pain or discouragement, remember that God will always use our suffering for His purposes. Our suffering silences Satan, our suffering enables us to glorify God, our suffering makes us more like Christ, our suffering makes us appreciative, and, ultimately, our suffering teaches us to depend on God.” —Pastor M.R. DeHaan, “BROKEN THINGS: WHY WE SUFFER,” page 60; Barbour Publishing, Inc., 1948
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